Tilly tells it like it is part 3

When being a normal mummy got on top of her, she sat and dreamed of one day becoming an architect 

More bon mots from the straight-talking Miss Tilly.

Tilly: Do you know, Kaden's mummy isn't a normal mummy.  She doesn't just do cooking and work and stuff like Hannah. She's an [impressed voice here] architect.

I suppose it could be worse.  Tilly might have got the impression that I swan around all day, drinking cocktails and enjoying myself.  At least she's noticed that there's some 'work and stuff' that goes on round here.  Still, I think we might need to sign her up for feminism 101...

... and while we're at it, we'll enrol her in ageism 101 too:

Tilly says: 'tinkly wrinkly'.  We say: 'lived in and interesting'.

Tilly: Old people are ugly.  When Grandma was Dave's mummy, she wasn't ugly.  And Hannah isn't ugly.
Hannah: Why do you think old people are ugly Tilly?
Tilly: It's because their faces are all tinkly wrinkly.

And finally, although I'm not ugly (hoorah!) I do have a problem with exsanguination:

Dave: Don't you think Hannah looks dashing and debonaire in her red scarf?
Tilly: I think she looks like she's got spotty blood running down her neck.

Spotty blood or dashing and debonaire?  Reader, you decide